Heart test you can do yourself: no-brainer

Why pay for an expensive “stress test.” This one is a no-brainer. This is how you do your own!

Get on a treadmill and walk on it. Now if you can’t keep your balance on one, try an exercise bike. These machines have heart rate monitors. You can find it by holding onto the metal parts. These metal parts sense your heart rate when you hold your thumb around the metal part. Your thumb has a pulse, so you want to hold you whole hand around the metal sensor, and hold both hands on the metal sensors. Now that will get your pulse. Some exercise machines are not accurate and this is not exactly scientific. Well? Western medicine “stress tests” are extremely expensive…so what do you expect? Try a few of these machines and you’ll find one that isn’t screwy. You can’t expect miracles, after all. A few docs are screwy, right?

Now, start going on that treadmill fast. As fast as you safely can. Please do not give yourself a heart attack. I don’t want to be sued. You want to see your heart rate go up.

Now…If your heart rate goes up over 200 and stays there, I’d say your ticker is not in very good shape. It’s time to reconsider your lifestyle and make some changes. Let’s assume for now that it doesn’t do that. It’s okay if it goes up to 200 momentarily. Just for a moment, but it shouldn’t hang there. No no no.

Now hold your fast pace for a bit, as long as you aren’t straining yourself real badly. Then, I want you to slow down. Don’t suddenly stop, but slow down from a run, or fast walk, to a slower walk. Keep monitoring your heart rate. Did it go down right away, or is it still racing at the same speed?

If it went down fast, like in a minute, I’d say you can safely forego any stress test out there. Mine does! But if it’s still racing five or (yikes!) ten minutes later I’d say you need to take care of your heart. It shouldn’t be racing like that.

Older people definitely need to COOL DOWN when exercising. You shouldn’t just suddenly stop after exercising vigorously. Gradually slow down. So when running, walk for a bit, then stop. I’m also concerned about those who start suddenly. That, too, strains people’s hearts. It might be unavoidable during times of excitement, like if you’re running a road race or if you just couldn’t help but run real fast out of the nuthouse. If you anticipate such a thing, try to warm up beforehand. Maybe secretly jog in place in the bathroom when no one’s looking before you make the big run for it.

After all, freedom’s great but we want to be alive to enjoy it!

Feedback and comments welcome!