Groups, leadership, and takeover

Thanks to a pal for pointing this out.

Groups have their ups and downs. Sometimes we start groups with the best of intentions but somehow, the group gets hijacked. Has this ever happened to you? You start a chess club,  but some asshole would rather play checkers. So he says, “Hey, does anyone want to play checkers, come meet with me over there!” and he invites the guys over to Starbucks. Soon, you’re all alone at Dunkin Donuts where you had meeting for the chess club for the past six months. You carry your chess pieces home for the final time, disgusted. They even took the chess board. Now, it’s a checkers board.

That happened to me. I used to be a member of Weight Watchers Online. I started a Mental Illness thread. Okay, okay, I know….yeah I have the right to change my mind and did…..Anyway, many joined. Then, another gal started a Lexapro thread. So all those gals joined that one. Then, they claimed she started the whole thing. She didn’t. I had started it, but never mind that.

I thought it would be good for us to get off of Weight Watchers, maybe have our own site. So I started one. They complained and complained, saying they didn’t like it.

Another gal said, “I can do it better.” So she actually MOVED THE SITE. Took it off and moved the site to another URL. They called Debby their hero and said she was so fucking smart. Then they said that Debby had started it. No, I started it, but Debby stole it.

I had started the group and initiated our move off of Weight Watchers. All of us were overweight from psychiatric drugs. I was the only one who had lost all the weight I had gained from the drugs.

I guess they were just plain jealous. One day, they got very hostile and kicked me out. Yep, I had started it, but they kicked me out. Then, they patted themselves on their backs and told themselves “job well done” and over and over about how great they were, getting rid of the “bad apples” in the group.

They also said I was “no longer a person.” Debby said that.

One day they said I was “violent” and all of them locked their doors in group paranoaic fear. Another time they said Welfare should take Puzzle should be taken away from me and I should be forcibly locked up for a long time. Another time they said I had a personality disorder. One of them sent the cops to my home. One of them had a relative on the local cop force so yes it got scary. She was on the West Coast but she said she could call her brother-in-law and find out all the dirt on what they knew about me. They honestly thought (in their mass paranoia) that I was going to go on a shooting rampage and “kill them all.”

That was 2012. Yeah that was one bad year all right.

This is a result of false notions, false fears, totally incorrect notions about a person. They were completely wrong.

Please, either laugh or cry. I have no clue which would be a more emotionally appropriate response for these losers.

2 thoughts on “Groups, leadership, and takeover”

  1. Julie, the “founders/ creators” often do not profit much )or sometimes nothing) of the original idea. Or the founders/ creatorscan enjoy little recognition while their were alive.

    Funny enough… i had read that the “imitators” often profit way more $$$.

    Sometimes the imitators can have…
    a) “more eye” for business/ marketing;
    b) more ambitions & less scruples;
    c) more acess to $$$,
    d) nice looks/ smooth talking (con-men… or con-women);
    e) are willing to make compromisses, and sell their soul to the devil.

    And even some companies (big and small), maybe be world known for a few decades, and then disapear, or “get eaten/ absorved” by their larger competitors. At the techological side that is seem often.

    Example: a “very small company” gets huge sucess with a very good product. A niche product, or it could have the potencial to capture more and more share of the market. Suddenly the small company is bougth by the big shark company.

    And the some consumers think: “great with that great product and acess to money, the original product is going to be a world class product, and better & better”.

    And times passes… the original product (branded or rebranded), disapears from the market, the following generation of products of that brand ARE MORE EXPENSIVE % WORSEEE (not consumer friendly anymore).
    … but by that time… there was no competion at the market. Microsoft (and other big names), do this stuff.

    As for small companies that are owned by families, and get consistent products with the decades… sometimes after the founder/creator… or died or retired… are not the same anymore. Can even close the doors soon after to make quick dollars for the widow.

    So life is unfair and does not reward properly (according to effort/ merit/ the truth)? YES.

    As for leaders… and if they are needed or not… history says: leaders are needed.
    The killing of the leaders… often leads to the extintion of what he/ she fougth for.

    And “the leader” maybe not who leads the army and carries the sword. The leader can be “the brains”. Or the leader can be the $$$/ the energy/ the good ideas (if the rest of the pieces exist and there is good coordenation).

    Anyway… there are good leaders, bad leaders, and blind leaders. And also there are the folks that elected Trump 🙂

    Some leaders (ideologues?) of the anti-psychiatry ideas… wrote books (like Thomas Szasz). but never wanted to get deeply involved with getting their hands dirty at changing things at day-to-day-world.

    Is that surprising? Writers can like the theory… and dislike dealing with the typical madman and the typical madwoman? Feel pity for the mad… and hate them at the same time?

    I think is due to things that like that… the leaders must be ex-users. Others can help, yes.

    As for wannabe be ex-users that:
    a) dont thave the time for others;
    b) dont have at least average energy;
    c) have no idea what they want (& dont think & dont read & dont practice);
    d) dont care for others users… or dont care to support ex-users?

    Ah well, please dear a)b)c)d)?
    I dont have the time/pacience for “lazy babies” like you.
    Prove yourself worthy, then come back when you are grown up.

    1. I recall this shop called the Coffee Connection. Sadly, it got swallowed up by Starbucks. With the promise that Starbucks would make it “better.” That was so sad. Little banks got eaten by big banks. And of course, big hospitals bought up the little ones, too, and now rule entire regions. They call it continuity of care. I call it What care? HIPAA is Dead and gone.

Feedback and comments welcome!