What’s the scariest thing to dress up as? How about dressing up as a Mental Health Professional! Just think of the ways such people are scary! Others will back off as soon as they see you coming!
Such folks have their unique Weapons of Mass Destruction. Ah, can we count the ways?
Threats serve to scare people into continuing their “services” even though it’s not really logical to do so. A decently effective threat might be, “You must stay in ‘treatment’ otherwise you will relapse.” That’s pretty much what they say. They’ll tell you you need “treatment” due to your shortcomings and limitations. Their fear is that you’ll get better and won’t need them anymore. Yikes, they’ll have no one to control and boss around. What to do?
Most people who insist on staying in treatment are actually addicted to it, horribly addicted. Take it from me as I went through it myself. Never mind the drugs people are having so much trouble getting off of. Therapy is so addictive, and this is rarely mentioned in the official literature. Obviously they don’t want us to know! As soon as you start therapy you become dependent, increasingly so as time goes on.
I’ve been reading a book on this that so far confirms my own self-observations and observations of others. Much as you insist you aren’t addicted, you most likely are.
This book is called Beware the Talking Cure. The book explains the dependency. Not only that, but once dependent, a person will loosen ties with those they connect with outside of the therapy relationship. I have seen this happen and it’s sad. I’ve seen therapy break up marriages because the patient is halfway married to the therapist, and this goes for any gender combination.
I’ve heard people say they aren’t getting anywhere in therapy, or even getting worse. What’s the therapist’s solution? Increase frequency of therapy! So you’re hooked, and the proposed solution to being addicted is more of the addicting activity. Makes sense, eh?
I’ve seen it in others and in myself, too. As therapy becomes more central in a person’s life, they see the therapist as “friend” inside their minds. Because the friendship need appears to be satisfied by therapy, other healthy and supportive relationships get put on the back burner.
We all know what happens to those back burner friends. You’re not there anymore, unavailable to them. Don’t expect your friends to stick around. Many do not.
Well, pal, now you are stuck. You do have a friend, a person you confide in, but if that’s your therapist, you’re hooked, especially if you do not have anyone else.
I hear stuff like, “My therapist keeps me alive.” I feel like rolling my eyes but I don’t. When I said that stuff, the exact same line, I was definitely addicted. Not only that my therapist was making my life worse by isolating me in the therapy relationship.
As my friends dropped away, each departure was victory for her. Not only that, but each time she rationalized by telling me that the person wasn’t a good friend to begin with. If the person who has left is your spouse, the therapist might try to convince you that his/her leaving was for your own good. No, not quite…for the therapist’s own good. I have seen enough fine marriages break up due to one person being in therapy to make me sick.
While I agree that it isn’t so morally sound to have an extramarital affair, let’s look at this from the spouse’s point of view. You’re in therapy, have been unavailable to him/her, so do you really expect him/her not to be tempted? Also, consider that you, too, are having an affair…with the therapist.
If therapy isn’t helping, then I’d say END IT. Don’t stick with therapy that “keep you on an even keel.” Isn’t therapy supposed to be about improving lives? If there’s no improvement, then that therapy is harming you.
What happens when you try to leave? You might get a call from the therapist trying to win you back. Once I remember a therapist who generally was not available nor reachable by phone nor page spent an entire half hour trying to get me back! I had never spent that much time on the phone with her before. How ironic! I guess she was desperate. I suppose if that’s how she felt maybe she needed “treatment” herself. Better yet, another source of income.
If I were supervising therapists, I’d call each of them into my office and make sure they have a plan to end therapy once the patient is better. I’d make sure each of them intended to help the patient get better, rather than sustaining that patient in his/her sickness, as so many tend to do.
I keep wondering as to which method is best suited for ending therapy addiction. Cold turkey, taper, or find a substitute addiction that might be less harmful than therapy addiction. Kind of like nicotine patches for smokers.
When you try to quit, the therapist may insist on several sessions of “termination.” I can promise you that these “termination” sessions can drag on endlessly and even suck you back.
If therapy is not helping why continue with this harm just for the therapist’s sake? She/he is getting paid. And if they’re as mentally stable as they claim to be, trust me, she’ll get over it.