How do I feel? I don’t know.
A lot has happened since then. I don’t really have the energy to get into it. My T said she was terminating with me because I was refusing treatment; however, she called me Monday and had me in there yesterday. Then she made another appointment for me Thursday–that is, tomorrow. But change of plans: today at 4, I am meeting with her and Dr. P together at Dr. P’s office. I received the e-mail regarding this meeting from my T at about 5:30 this morning. I responded quickly. She caught me just in time, as I was about to take Puzzle for her walk. So now, I will be leaving in about two hours to get there. I plan to be a little early. It is better to be early than to be late.
I don’t know what will happen from here. It will be an intense meeting. Other than that, I don’t know how it will go. And I know this much: This is the first time that Dr. P and my T will be meeting in person.
I am tired. I am feeling very low today. I have had days of more energy and today is a day that I am having trouble getting everything done that I want to get done. I have my priorities.
Saturday, July 23, 2011 #3
My case manager from DMH was here briefly and brought my things. Then I spoke with a psychiatrist. I guess I was able to impress upon her that I am not “actively suicidal” so she is letting me go home.
My blood pressure this morning: normal
My pulse: 45
They did not weigh me the whole time I was here. That’s okay. I very well may have refused to get on the scale.
Back to my life.
Saturday, July 23, 2011 #2
I have showered. I notice that the edema is gone. I know this because my socks make very little imprint on my legs. They no longer watch me except when I eat. I have not seen a doctor today. Apparently I am going to be allowed a cup of coffee. That would be nice.