I have some goals for myself today. My friend (yes, I still have a couple of friends) says I seem brighter and more positive.
I want to be strong enough to do National Novel Writing Month this year. NaNoWriMo, as it is called, which I did last year, involves writing an entire book in the month of November. It begins November first and ends the 30th. The NaNoWriMo requirement is 50,000 words–arbitrarily. Last year, my book, a memoir, was 86,000 words, and I completed it in about three weeks. My book was about my hitch-hiking trip across the country that I did in 1979. It was also about my anorexia that I was experiencing while writing the book. I chronicled my NaNoWriMo experience here in my blog. Just click on National Novel Writing Month over on the left to read about it. My entries are rather brief. I was busy. I worked maybe six to seven hours a day, seven days a week. I wrote the equivalent of a term paper a day, maybe 20 pages.
In order to do National Novel Writing Month, I must get an outline ready. I must be able to concentrate. I must have physical strength. I must have drive. I must have ambition. I must be able to have goals and follow through with them. I must be able to care about myself. I must get over this depression. I must have energy. I must want to live. And I must eat to stay alive.
Yes, I admit I must eat.
This is going to be incredibly difficult to pull together by November. I do not want to eat. I do not, do not, do not want to eat.
I think I will go out and buy some eggs today.