Uh-oh

I have been bingeing on and off since Wednesday night, which is when I wrote about the binge here.  Thursday I did not eat at all; Friday I ate sparsely until I got home from Dr. P’s, then I binged, and I just had a binge now.  Okay, so I binged three times since Wednesday.

This is not good.  If the trend continues, I may become suicidal.  The bingeing life is not a life worth living.  I have lived with bingeing and I do not wish to live with it again.

“IF the trend continues….”  So.  If I tell my therapist about this, it’s like I’m threatening suicide, isn’t it?  She can hospitalize me just for saying this.  So I’d better keep it to myself, eh?

But I need the bingeing to stop immediately.  So that I don’t have to die.  I guess I’m all alone with this.   If I tell Dr. P or my therapist just how desperate I am to get the bingeing under control, I’ll be hospitalized.  And the hospital is DEFINITELY not the answer.

Feedback and comments welcome!