I found 47 typed pages of an old journal and scanned them all. Here’s a little snippet I discovered:
The following are reasons to disbelieve in God:
Life is unfair.
Bad things happen for no apparent reason.
Good things happen for no apparent reason.
Self-control is useless.
Nature is cruel.
It is through our suffering that we are healed.
The above are also reasons to believe, with all conviction, in the power and love of God.